NFL Week 2 — WTF Is Happening?

The Saturday Night Live cast should revive the Michael Vick, Really? skit and change its subject to…well, any number of happenings around the NFL will do. I should have known NFL Sunday would be nightmarish when I laid eyes on those gawd awful Pittsburgh Steelers Techmo Bowl throwback unis. If only the Browns had their throwback day this weekend, O.J. could have avoided being arrested.

“Big” Ben Roethlisberger went 21 of 34 for 242 yards to 7 different receivers.

Derek Anderson & Braylon Edwards

Speaking of the Browns…are you kidding me? After a fiery press conference last week from Joe Jurevicius and the release of Charlie Frye, Buffalo brought the thunder. Derek Anderson and Braylon Edwards (aka. Q Smooth) went tit for tat with the Bengals. Add to that the downhill running of Jamal Lewis (aka. Big Jada), and the Browns arguably have a shot at winning some games.

And Ocho Cinco has balls. After taking a flying leap into the Dog Pound and receiving a beer bath, Chad Johnson wasted no time heading back over to make a truce.

AP Photo

Will someone tell me where Maurice Jones-Drew has been hiding? Not only did I boldly predict a 1,500-yard, 20+ TD season from him, but I also put all my chips on MJD in the Fantasy Football realm. I haven’t lost hope yet. But if he wants to hurry up and play some football, I’d be super stoked.

And are the Texans really 2-0? Yep. And Mario Williams really has a fleet of bad-ass cars too (way to spend that check, Mario!). While the spotlight remains on their much improved offense, you can’t overlook the revamped defensive, particularly the front line. Mario, Amobi Okoye, and veteran DE (and San Antonio native), ND Kalu are applying pressure where and when necessary.

After watching most of the offerings of Week 2, I can take few things for granted.

• Steve Smith is indestructible. Who else can get tackled by 5 opposing players, shrug them off like ragdolls, and then rub their face in it with a score? Prolly no one.
• I’ve been a Matt Schaub fan since he was a Dirty Bird. Another of my sleeper picks for the year, he definitely hasn’t disappointed. It would be great if he found some more targets to throw to other than Andre Johnson. With a sprained PCL, Andre might need some help in Week 3. But what do I know, Matt? If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it, right?
• Rex Grossman still sucks. Next.
• Who’s in charge of handing out the NFL Rookie of the Year Award? Somebody just give it to Adrian Peterson already. He’s a frikken stud.

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